tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36668672011-04-22T15:11:34.873+10:00Dawei's House of Debauchery and Bee-yotchingMe bitching.
That is all.Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comBlogger3961100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-23435818311211811962008-08-28T20:07:00.003+10:002008-08-28T20:08:38.988+10:00Woah.I'm still here, really. I am just you know, having a bit of writer-y impotence. Not permanent.But really, no other news to report. Oh, I may be starting medicine next year. Eek.Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-18172609603626362852008-04-10T23:01:00.002+10:002008-04-10T23:31:22.912+10:00Jacob said something in my comments recently, about how I have a seven year "head start" on the gay sex--because I'm SO much older than he is!--thing (although I'm sure some guys are having gay anal intercourse at like, eleven, but I'm sure they aren't really enjoying being fucked by their fathers or gang members out for revenge, etc.), and it really got me thinking about young homos. I've Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-70596567412092339862008-04-09T22:42:00.002+10:002008-04-09T22:55:26.519+10:00I don't know why you all have to make fun of me because I said I was a dominant top. I didn't say I was a raging heterosexualised homosexual, all Brut-wearing, chap-donning, blue collar-aspiring, Butchy McVadgeLick. I mean, I wear Calvin Klein underwear, have enjoyed white wine in a pub, spend way too much on haircuts and shoes, and spend huge chunks of my weekends 'antiquing' in markets and Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-32535094509942464322008-04-02T00:05:00.002+10:002008-04-02T00:20:41.070+10:00First off, ignore any comment-posting from anyone named "Dawei" in my comments: so clearly not me. Like, if you can't come up with an original diss at me, Monsieur Faux Dawei, at least try to mimic my acidic way of dealing with other triflings/plebs, mmkay? Secondly, sorry I haven't been around much of late; I will try to fix that in future. I know most of you really do miss my frequent Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-43355439777224741652008-03-19T20:29:00.000+10:002008-03-19T20:30:18.988+10:00Fine, God, I'm back already.Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-42312968027265424892008-02-01T23:21:00.000+10:002008-02-01T23:33:21.556+10:00Ugh, this was the assiest week, like, evah. Firstly, my grandmother had two heart attacks! Okay, so they weren't hugely severe, and she isn't dead, but she is still in hospital and the cardiologist said that if she hadn't already been in hospital when the second attack hit her she could have carked it. Gulp. I've been quite lucky in that death hasn't really touched me much. I've only had one Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-38604631369734487922008-01-25T20:02:00.000+10:002008-01-25T20:03:53.204+10:00Right now, I totally feel like a cigarette. God, sometimes I'm so badass it kills me.Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-88735193927449137322008-01-23T12:23:00.000+10:002008-01-23T14:08:33.742+10:00Sorry, Heath Ledger family, no one is going to buy that he accidently died of pneumonia! Just face facts: Ledger? Suicidal, depressed, drug addict pussy. There. Doesn't that feel better?I KNEW that line he gave a few months ago about being depressed as "the character" of the Joker was encrouching on his non-acting time as the role was so "intense". Excuse to shoot up, much? You were an actor, Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-47947636381525563852008-01-17T23:15:00.000+10:002008-01-17T23:37:44.910+10:00Ugh, I have a cold. I shouldn't complain, as I don't have, like, breast cancer like one of my mother's good friends, and I'm not like, projectile vomiting or anything gross like that, but I'm still wallowing in my misfortune. I've had extreme sinus pain, constant runny nose, mucous ahoy, and now I'm coughing like a beast-- and not even relieving coughing, but mostly dry hacking coughs (with only Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-37925297344654419542008-01-10T19:24:00.000+10:002008-01-10T19:48:10.637+10:00Overheard in Louis Vuitton:Dawei: *talking with sales assistant**crazed stomping of two noxious, manorexic fags with bad blond tips*Crazed Noxious Fag #1: *thrusting hand out and pointing, directing speech to another sales person standing next to Dawei's sales assistant* Let me see that small satchel bag over there!Sales Assistant: Uhm... this one?Crazed Noxious Fag #2: Yes, with the zzzzzzzzi-hpDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-36555970332140909882008-01-04T22:25:00.000+10:002008-01-04T22:37:15.163+10:00Well, that was the WORST CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEAR PERIOD EVER!!!!!Firstly, our family CANCELLED Christmas as my mother and sister were both struck down with some hideous nausea/explosive diarrhoea-ish virus (they STILL have the runs!). We decided to postpone gift-giving, etc. until they both feel better. Hello, it's like, ten days later, and I still haven't got my presents. I've already been warnedDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-18648546167649721722007-12-24T21:22:00.000+10:002007-12-24T23:20:30.690+10:00Merry Christmas, y'all! I'm trying to get into the festive season as much as possible, despite the fact that here in lame Australia there is no snow, or no smell of undrinkable mulled wine in the air, and all that other unfortunate Northern crap that I've been (well, we as a collective whole) have been illusioned with as being what is definitively "Christmas". Not that I'm being a total grouch; Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-43866119140248521802007-12-14T21:11:00.000+10:002007-12-14T21:22:27.459+10:00It's 9 o'clock on a Friday night. I'm home alone, and currently debating with myself whether to have another glass of nasty cheap red wine, or make myself an icecream cone made from mint choc chip icecream and You'll Love Coles...! waffle cones. I haven't been this pathetic in a long time, people. Actually, I'm quite enjoying this moment of wallowing. Wallowing in self-pity is totally like yoga Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-81691401617458367662007-12-13T18:21:00.000+10:002007-12-13T18:28:09.928+10:00I promise I'll be better with my blogging soon. But I'm just so stressed out at the moment. I'm totally in organisation mode. I've just had my mother's 1000th birthday dinner to organise, and now it's, like, Christmas in ten days or some shit. I have NO presents, people. To make matters worse, I've just realised that I'm starting a week on the Sunshine Coast soon! Ugh. So I've been in a flurry Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1630751829201645862007-12-06T23:01:00.001+10:002007-12-06T23:08:42.550+10:00The other day I overheard (okay, I was eavesdropping) a conversation going on between two people. Anyway, this guy was saying that he was totally into blogging. I wouldn't have had a second thought about it (other than "you blog? Psshuh! LOSER!"), except he was extremely boneable, in that doofy, dorkish way. I thought that maybe he reads my blog, and then I think I actually squeezed out a few Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-31266799152469082552007-11-30T11:16:00.000+10:002007-11-30T11:23:37.973+10:00What is with blue collar workers and using the toilets of their employers? This morning our pool is being drained as it needs reconcreting or some shit (and because Brisbane is a fucking backwater desert you can't just backwash the pool: you have to SELL the water from the pool by paying a man to drain it... yeah, I can't work that out either). Anyway, the workers keep coming in to use my toilet!Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-22740933781216100082007-11-29T14:42:00.000+10:002007-11-29T15:00:24.679+10:00I know no one cares about election issues anymore, and I don't want to start thinking about the next federal election (this ain't America, people! Can you believe they STILL haven't worked out the Hilary/Obama problem, despite seeming YEARS of campaigning? And you thought 10 days of Work Choices ads were bad!). However, what are the Libs thinking putting in Brendan "Vagina Mouth" Nelson as leaderDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-36417404768145339602007-11-15T22:25:00.000+10:002007-11-15T22:35:11.846+10:00Hey team. Sorry if I've been quiet. But if you think that my typing seems more brown now then you'd be right! I'm just back from a few days in Noosa, aka Rich-Retired-Lady-and-Feral-Faux Überfab-Type-from-Melbourne-ville. I totally like Noosa; for some reason I feel really at home there, even though I'm not a retired rich lady or faux, pretentious loser from Melbourne who really shouldn't be Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-17248513691829660982007-11-01T23:19:00.000+10:002007-11-01T23:37:35.666+10:00Okay, getting used to my hair. I look a bit like Neil from So You Think You Can Dance?... but I can live with that. I mean, he's more poofy than me as he's a dancer and all, and his name is Neil, for fuck's sake, but still. I would be willing to look beyond that if he wanted to do some of that prancing and bending-and-snap!ing naked in front of me. And I have my suspicions that he isn't a naturalDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1703874665740748002007-10-24T21:20:00.000+10:002007-10-25T00:10:51.750+10:00Do you want to know two inappropriate crushes I currently have on characters in TV ads?CRUSH ONEThe genie on that insipid Tim Tams ad with that ultra-annoying "I don't wantcha... to be my slave" song.I know you are all aware that I totally dig dark good looks, but I think the genie dude is taking that a little too far. Although my crush really enforces my totally liberal attitudes at the moment! Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-40762608327559242572007-10-23T22:09:00.000+10:002007-10-23T23:49:39.848+10:00Tragedy. Horror. Spontaneous combustion. Mass hysteria. Throat closing over. Spots in front of my eyes. Help me, someone. HELP ME.I've butchered my beauty! I've ruined crowning glory! My hair! My hair! What did I do to my hair? ARGH. I could so murder my idiotic hair stylist. She suggested I get this treatment to my hair that would "rejuvenate" my blond. Okay, it's a colour! Stop giving me the Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-27698042847084356022007-10-18T10:31:00.000+10:002007-10-18T13:37:33.760+10:00You know those scenes in bad porn movies where the pool guy spies on some hot naked dude who is conveniently sleeping in the hot sun without getting inappropriate ass-sweat and then the hot guy wakes up and tells the pool guy to get more comfortable and the pool guy strips off to an obscenely skimpy pair of dick togs and then the sleeping hot guy starts to massage his dick and then the pool guy Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-53877812881071482572007-10-12T12:45:00.000+10:002007-10-12T13:02:48.927+10:00Sorry for not posting this week but I've been just so upset from my being sprayed in my comments I've been off licking my wounds...Pssshya! I have every confidence in my ability to socialise, be independent, and know the value of money, etc. Like, I used to get an allowance people (and still kinda do in a funny way, but sshhh); I know how to budget! Like, take my new mobile phone. I just bought Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-88883627983788078672007-10-04T14:10:00.001+10:002007-10-04T14:45:30.907+10:00Salut bitches, I'm back! I'm a little wiser, a little older, a little more mature, a little richer, a little browner, a little blonder, harder, better, faster, stronger, etc.; a little more ready in general. This is IT people. My year of change! January is so not the start of the year, by the way. Obviously the beginning of the year is at one's birthday (particularly if one is a quarter of a Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-38551088344349777552007-09-21T21:49:00.000+10:002007-09-21T22:38:53.061+10:00Oh my God! I am so impressed with myself. I totally stimulated socio-political debate! I feel so mature and proper. I feel like... The Onion. Or Miranda Devine. Or one of those serious bloggers. I feel so inspired, I think I'm going to do a full Dawei-commentary on the federal election.But now I just have to balance my new-found social intelligence with some mindless consumerism. It's my birthdayDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-36035188597379232692007-09-19T00:05:00.000+10:002007-09-19T00:21:17.864+10:00This story makes me feel sick. Fucking lesbians! No wonder nobody likes you. I'm not normally very gay pride (not that I really count lesbianism as gayness as it's gross and unnatural), but this story makes me ashamed to be all homosexually. Like, listen you lesbo bitch, one of the few good things about being a lesbian is that you can somewhat easily have children with your "significant other". Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-55753942379120574262007-09-14T22:45:00.000+10:002007-09-14T22:48:32.436+10:00On a scale of one to ten, how gay is it for a blond guy to go... blond?Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-91066886792422782622007-09-13T18:22:00.000+10:002007-09-13T18:57:37.590+10:00I wonder if when Gordon "Donkey" Sloan was busy flapping his supposedly enormous cock about the Big Brother house back in 2001, he could possibly know his death would be reported long after he had been forgotten by the majority of popular culture memory. I suppose it says something about me that I remembered him; although I will admit that my attention span of Big Brother runs to male contestantsDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-32102667618524468542007-09-05T15:09:00.000+10:002007-09-05T15:28:45.648+10:00The other day, in a fit of depression and self-mutilation (self-cutting is so cool! I might start a MySpace about it), I accidentally sliced an artery. I'm so totally suicidal! Actually, I'm not. Nor am I into self-cutting. Nor am I depressed (well, no more than the usual rich blond fag-boy). I noticed a window had a big crack in it, so I decided to see if it was indeed broken. So I poked at the Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-73487563367962006392007-08-31T13:37:00.001+10:002008-12-11T12:01:13.704+10:00What does it say about me that I think I really want to have hot, anal intercourse with this rather ugly, effeminate character? I picture Husny's anus to be in a permanent state of ass-gape, however, I think he would be a really hot ride. I think I'm the only person on the planet who doesn't want to bone Johnny Depp, so it's not that. I think I have, like, a terrorist fetish. I mean, not like Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-13548081432456370552007-08-28T15:52:00.000+10:002007-08-28T16:03:43.937+10:00Shut up, Michael Caton. Everybody knows you haven't had an original idea or role since The Castle (although I must be the only Australian to find this film to be the most idiotic, embarrassing, lame movie to come out of our cultural abyss). To be sassed by Rob Schneider is such a burn. It's like being outrun by a 'tard, or realising that Studly McSixpack isn't impressed with you, but rather Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-39359334508682336892007-08-17T12:20:00.001+10:002007-08-17T12:45:57.628+10:00Sigh, I have to attend another wedding tomorrow. This will be my third wedding in a year. What are they putting in the water up here? I have decided that I am thoroughly unromantic, and despise weddings. All they are is stress. I have nothing to wear. I hate being in photos. I hate speeches. I especially hate jokey-jokey in-joke jolly-fun type humour that I never get, and always seems to litter Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-70829583970763107712007-08-14T22:21:00.000+10:002007-08-14T22:38:54.631+10:00Yesterday I met my ideal man. Unfortunately, I'm currently in a relationship. And secondly, I met my ideal man in a dream. But the dream was so vivid. You know the kind: time seems to move in real time, and all your senses are in overload, crackling with anticipation of certain happiness until the idiot next to you coughs or sneezes or gets up to take a thundering piss in the en suite (or if you Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-59094640487576445682007-08-09T21:28:00.000+10:002007-08-09T21:51:12.267+10:00In honour of my good pal Sam, I'm going to steal his "Ads I Hate" post. He's off somewhere overseas apparently, which I can hardly believe. What person from fucking Newcastle travels overseas as much as him?? Although I bet he's gone to New Zealand or Bali or Fiji or somewhere equally lame, and classed that as "overseas". Like those embarrassing wedding spreads in Sunday papers. You know, where Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-55262035498942375442007-08-08T16:09:00.000+10:002007-08-08T16:37:23.248+10:00You know what's annoying me at the moment? I mean other than fat people wearing skinny jeans or those uber-cutsie "You'll Love!..." Coles product phrase cartoon people (seriously, if someone needs a turbo pimpslap its that little cunt on the plain flour packet)? This fucking water "crisis" here in Queensland. BORING. Yes, I know we have no rain. That in itself is boring. But I'm sick of endless Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-4721531169989306242007-08-02T16:42:00.000+10:002007-08-02T16:56:06.521+10:00"Anyway I'll be going now," he added. Clearly disgusted, Koch replied: "And you may not be coming back." Coleman then tried to justify himself by yelling from backstage: "The kids would be in school by now."Not trying to be all Potter-centric here, but I've been busy "neener-neener"ing everyone I know who currently has the flu who were too scared to get the flu shot or believed it would make themDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-67663756319652614602007-07-25T23:46:00.000+10:002007-07-25T23:57:23.466+10:00And the award for Least Convincing Fictional Couple goes to... Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks! We congratulate Lupin and Tonks, as well as esteemed runners-up Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. We remind both couples that their children "Ted" and "Suri" are still neck and neck in the category of Least Likeable Robotic, Mary-Sue-esque Child, although "Bindi Irwin" is still the strong favourite for theDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-13159548613817491212007-07-19T21:40:00.000+10:002007-07-19T21:41:50.751+10:00On a scale of 1-100, how bad is it to discover what your boyfriend's password to his email is, and then use it to systematically read his emails for mentions of yourself? Purely hypothetically of course...Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-24959915078456742602007-07-12T15:36:00.000+10:002007-07-12T15:43:58.824+10:00Did y'all know Stan Zemanek died? Nope, neither did I. Huh. Also: Prue MacSween is (or was, I guess) his publicist, which explains her omnipresence on Beauty and the Beast back in the day. BatB used to be part of my skipping-uni TV schedule (followed by Oprah and Passions), so it is quite sad in a way. But then again, he was a complete ass, which is now explained by the grapefruit-sized tumors inDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-15918140303779934522007-07-11T20:06:00.000+10:002007-07-11T20:30:34.560+10:00Ugh, I'm so bloated at the moment. To quote Cher from Clueless, I feel like such a heifer. Today I've eaten a bread roll with prosciutto, almost an entire packet of "You'll Love" Coles poor man's Twisties (and indeed I do love them, same with their cheese corn chips: they are exactly the same, only you don't get any of that fake cheesy residue on your fingers, as if you have been wanking off a Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-25192679375259141222007-07-10T20:21:00.001+10:002008-12-11T12:01:14.094+10:00I don't get people's fascination with Daniel Radcliffe. I mean, he's kind of a block-head, has a twatty accent (I am well aware that some English accents are nice; however, his is quite irritating in a plummy, faux-educated sort of way), and honestly: Harry the character is completely unlikeable in book-form. Just because Daniel manages to also capture this on film does not make him particularly Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-79260025481581285422007-07-06T11:54:00.000+10:002007-07-06T12:06:19.558+10:00Ugh, I think I have AIDS. I've had a cold for like, five days now. And I normally never get colds, and if I do, they go away really quickly. And This is my second cold this winter! Obviously my immune system must be down. And I've only slept with one person in YEARS. Imagine how paranoid I would be if I was like, sucking off random dicks in parks or shagging around like a slutty 19 year old. UGH.Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-85699274706700630892007-07-04T11:01:00.001+10:002007-07-04T11:09:24.718+10:00Haha, I just got quite a hilarious email from my mother. At the moment she and my father are in London, and they are all concerned that they will be suspected as terrorists. This email was written very poorly (all lower-case, letters missing, etc.), and talked about how they were in some cafe when police suddenly swarmed on some random parked car, sirens blaring. Mum and Dad hauled ass out of Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-65987507052537613642007-06-28T22:45:00.000+10:002007-06-28T23:11:02.132+10:00I'm like, totally über-thin at the moment. Normally I would be all excited and shit, as my cheekbones become more pronounced, adding a nice accentuation to my rather refined features, and my hip bones tend to slightly stick out over my Acnes (which I'm down to like a 31! All you people with under 31 waists I don't want to hear from you). I'm totally into heroin chic at the moment. ANYWAY, I'm Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-81097717983533858932007-06-21T14:44:00.000+10:002007-06-21T14:47:55.763+10:00Not dead. But my parents are bumming around Europe at the moment, so I've been flat out busy. Like, I really want to be employed by the time they get back. My theory is that they'll be so shocked and surprised by my gainful employment that they'll decide to send me on my own jaunt around Europe! So anyway, I've been feverishly applying for jobs and attending interviews (read: lazily poking aroundDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-38785018578011833712007-05-31T23:26:00.000+10:002007-06-01T00:08:40.218+10:00I don't mean to take over Sam's monopoly on ad-bitching, but I've been simmering on this one for a while, and I can't hold it in anymore. I've realised that I'm all for "glass ceilings" when it comes to the advertising industry. Because now that women are all high-powered (or so they'd like to think), a trend of anti-male advertising is becoming more prevalent and really, it is quite offensive Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-29564282676219804412007-05-30T23:23:00.000+10:002007-05-30T23:54:50.427+10:00Do you want to know who is freaking bitch? Pete Murray's dog-wife. I was calmly enjoying a coffee the other morning, when who should plonk down at the table next to me but Monsieur Murray, his horrid wife, and their snot-nosed brat kid. Anyway, while he was sitting there, she and the brat went somewhere (she probably had to wipe its shitty arse; I bet he has autism the way his arms flayed as he Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-33037109751142943742007-05-24T16:10:00.001+10:002007-05-24T16:21:01.028+10:00Even MORE bad media news: I cannot for a second believe that the producers of Big Brother aren't telling housemate Emma that her father died! Are they insane? They say it's because her mother doesn't want to tell her until she's out of the house, so she can "grieve" in her own way. Whatever! And anyway, shouldn't it be Emma's decision? Remember when Katrina's "goldfish" died (well, that was Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-52174750756345150412007-05-24T15:43:00.000+10:002007-05-24T15:57:40.791+10:00To continue the "Australian media smells" theme, I just saw that (according to Reader's Digest) Bindi Irwin is Australia's 6th most trusted person! I'm sorry, but when I was like, her age, I used to pretend a mis-matched black square of cement on our street was ceiling of my secret cave and was filled with rubies and He-Man paraphernalia. I also used to tell my teachers that my parents were Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-42850016035606178092007-05-23T18:41:00.000+10:002007-05-23T18:58:31.997+10:00This story about that old bastard who wants to buy a house for the mother of her abandoned snot annoys me on so many levels. Firstly, why would you want to force this woman--who obviously has some serious issues--to raise a defenceless baby? People, dumping this baby was probably the best thing for it in the long run! The mother was probably some whore, cracked out of her mind. I'm pretty sure Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-41110019615425345522007-05-16T15:33:00.000+10:002007-05-16T16:05:44.190+10:00I think I seriously have bi-polar disease. Like, I have a strange dual self-concept that battles unseen in my brain with big rusty lances and those big-ass ball things on chains that are covered in spikes. Like, on the one hand, I have quite a decent attitude towards myself. I think that I'm relatively funky and cool, looks half-decent normally, is brainy and yet feisty, etc. But then the other Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-6621782158143673992007-05-10T16:09:00.000+10:002008-12-11T12:01:14.544+10:00Yuck.(I know it's a seemingly blatant rip-off, but I honestly was about to post the exact same thing!)But yes. Incredibly creepy. He looks like one of those cheerleader-type things in that Aphex Twin video. Or like some retarded child was mucking about on Photoshop and set the image to "swirl". Or that he is somehow a strange genetic blend of lizard and the clown from It, complete with Reese Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-43855685883313614002007-05-10T06:43:00.000+10:002008-12-11T12:01:14.745+10:00Well, obviously it's just an extremely bad photo. I think all the fat people out there are just itching to scream "anorexic" these days. I mean, she's got hips! Sure, it's probably one of the few times that Cate has bombed out in the fashion stakes, but rest assured, I don't think she'll be revisiting this Annie Lennox Cadaver look again. The pale makeup and short hair illusion makes her look a Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-69377117763595437222007-05-08T20:23:00.000+10:002007-05-08T20:42:50.022+10:00Ugh, I attempted to watch a bit of It Takes Two until Top Model started, but I just couldn't stand it. I saw Jade McCuntingCrae and... some other vaguely bi-racial looking "celebrity" (seriously, why team them up? Does their mutual latte-coloured skin force them to be together? Can they only be realistically romantically involved with each other (because for some reason they not only have to singDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-50871648001434524172007-05-03T22:37:00.001+10:002007-05-03T22:37:52.470+10:00Hmmm. I'm sort of used to it now.Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-84492013588156945082007-05-02T14:09:00.000+10:002007-05-02T14:21:19.600+10:00Oh, crap. I've just been playing around with my trimming shear-y thingies, and I've made a rookie error: not checking the fucking blade size. Ugh. So what was a planned tidy-up about the edges is now a complete sluttening of my genital region. Like, seriously. I feel like a prostitute. A very under-age prostitute. I'm normally so careful, but then BAM! Before I knew what was happening I had mowedDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-75686316729129289212007-05-01T21:41:00.000+10:002007-05-01T22:08:26.206+10:00I was feeling a bit down after a vicious attack in my comments ("unskilled", "unemployable", "delusional", how rude!), but then I realised that I've just spent the past four days in Sydney buying up Jil Sander and Prada, and then I didn't care as much. And anyway, my traffic isn't down! It's as mediocre as ever. I guess some people prefer quality to quantity.But yes. I survived my little trip to Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-31678509353767628332007-04-24T18:50:00.000+10:002007-04-24T19:10:12.891+10:00I don't normally watch Sunday night TV (it's my and Cap Guy's designated "date night" where we go out for food, drinks, and assorted other pleasures). For some reason we were home very early on Sunday night, and I managed to catch my first--and last--moments of Australia's Got Talent. The portion I managed to catch before being horrified into changing the channel was some kiddie fiddler-bait "Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-30139706696903498642007-04-17T22:06:00.000+10:002007-04-17T22:20:47.403+10:00I just changed a light bulb! I know that doesn't seem particularly butch, but if you knew our light bulbs, you would all be duly impressed. Like, submerged into the ceiling and encased in several layers of hideous glass. Ugh. My parents hired a "lighting specialist" for their last renovation, and he was a resounding dud. How utterly unsurprising for a blue-collar worker.In other more interesting Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-25748028825582617232007-04-12T19:04:00.000+10:002007-04-12T19:13:50.957+10:00My new haircut is so hot. Seriously guys. If you are ever down in the dumps, a hundred dollar snip picks you up no sweat. I look like a wood nymph Astroboy! Sometimes I'm such a trendsetter I just can't stand it.Now if you'll excuse me, my Nudie jeans and Industrie tee need to come out of the dryer (I know that (false) irony was a little heavy handed, but I'm not so totally clueless to not know Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-58261953519664852822007-04-11T22:41:00.000+10:002007-04-11T22:54:52.658+10:00I had a fit of desperation the other day. It looks as if I didn't get that job, which totally BUMMED me as I was all excited for it, and I haven't exactly been excited about employment for a very long time. Like, I even told people I applied for this job! How embarrassing when they realise that I didn't get it! I'm going to look like a major loser. Ugh. I hate weakening myself by showing that I Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-45199769549158980182007-04-04T23:16:00.000+10:002007-04-04T23:22:29.346+10:00Ok, so I haven't heard back from my job yet. I think I'm going to have to come to terms with the fact that I am going to have to apply for more than one job before I actually find some decent work. Sigh. Job hunting is so depressing. No wonder so many people go on the dole. I would so get the dole too, if only my parents weren't so rich. Or they could be rich, and sign that form thing saying thatDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-90960358714203260262007-04-03T21:45:00.000+10:002007-04-03T21:47:47.697+10:00Oh my God. My pee is like, bright orange, and smells like curdled smegma. I have jaundice! Or hepatitis. Or whatever that yellow-pee disease is. What if Cap Guy comes over for an impromptu watersports session????Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-10229405028199295082007-04-03T12:38:00.000+10:002007-04-03T13:05:23.294+10:00Oh, man. I am having, like, the worst week this week. For some reason I've been struck down with a Winter cold, even though it's not Winter yet! I mean, I've started to force myself back into jeans, but the heat is still oppressive enough for my genitals to become a hot, sweaty mess by the end of the day. Anyway, I have this cold, and while it isn't completely debilitating, my throat is a Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-42533676178363208112007-03-28T12:11:00.000+10:002007-03-28T12:37:38.767+10:00This is probably no surprise to anyone, but I am officially a haux-maux. I just caught myself actually wishing that I could be a woman! Not, like, forever in a tranny way, I'm not that bad! But I sort of wished to myself that I could be sans penis for a day or something, so I could totally walk around rocking those unreal C3PO Balenciaga legging thingies. I know they will probably become the new Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-19813968426299576482007-03-15T20:18:00.000+10:002007-03-15T20:27:33.757+10:00In what appears to be a creepy coincidence, I've noticed some hairs creep around my nipples the day after I submitted my hardcore application. If I had known that actually applying for work would speed up the aging process I never would have submitted it! And wait until I actually get the job instead of merely applying for one. Then I'll probably have to buy a pair of brown loafers, cut up my Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-56767741750511917652007-03-14T15:04:00.000+10:002007-03-14T17:56:33.344+10:00Get the brown paper bags ready. Get out the self-cutting implements. Pop some downers out of their aluminium wrapping and stir up an ice-cold, sandpaper-dry martini to wash them down. Dawei has just applied for his first real (interstate!) job.*puts head between knees and inhales deeply*I'm so excited about this (possible) job! I'm just itching to get the call that they want to interview me! Of Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-42464419580000692032007-03-07T14:55:00.000+10:002007-03-07T15:29:21.597+10:00Anthony Callea is gay.Erin Brockovich says that "if the Earth dies, we die too".Tomorrow's headlines: "Kittens are cute!" and "Smoking causes cancer".Oy.Although, isn't it a little silly that Anthony Callea was just somehow involved in the Mardi Gras celebrations (like, on the streets as a roving reported/bulge spotter or whatever?)? Like, obviousness aside, isn't his outing a little too Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-27607386573264491512007-02-27T21:52:00.000+10:002007-02-27T22:55:41.380+10:00I'm so pleased with myself! Today I shed my self-imposed bourgeois limitations and got back in touch with the more common side of Dawei. This doesn't sound too impressive I know, but seeing as I've designated 2007 to be my Year of Change I'm quite pleased that I've already stretched myself so early in the new year. Firstly, I totally took the bus today! Normally I am a train man if I have to takeDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-80939705392204257562007-02-26T13:45:00.000+10:002008-12-11T12:01:15.008+10:00A fat, black, struggling singer wins an Oscar for playing a fat, black, struggling singer. Wow, Jennifer Hudson! You, like, totally blew me away with that stretch of a role! Here's your goodie basket, gold statue, and even more unwarranted media attention! Oh, by the way, your bizarre frock pockets make you look slouchy and nervous.PS -- your jacket folds remind me of labia. In other words: eurch.Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-16608012565688070142007-02-25T23:21:00.000+10:002008-12-11T12:01:15.239+10:00Spotted outside City Beach, Broadbeach: Courtney from The Biggest Loser! Like, totally ommigod material here. Some slut fucks Ralph Fiennes in a bog while I get reality TV rejects. Sigh. I have no luck. But really. Obviously TBL hasn't taught him much: he was lounging around outside this lame shop--he was seriously propped up against the wall! Like, stand up, tubby--and he was smoking. In public!Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-33603245340770502872007-02-22T15:47:00.000+10:002007-02-22T16:01:16.128+10:00Wow, Today Tonight actually fabricates and exaggerates their stories? Really? My God! Stop the presses! Fundamental ideals of journalism, news, and the wider mass media have been shaken to their respective cores!Or not.Does anyone think Today Tonight is hard-hitting, truthful, investigative journalism? Because I suspect even the ferals out in Woop Woop and other assorted outer city suburb Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-20296690213042316052007-02-21T15:16:00.000+10:002007-02-21T15:32:55.943+10:00Cap Guy and I had a massive fight on Sunday night. Normally we don't fight all that much (we just niggle at each other with emotionally manipulative blather and other assorted guilt-inducing prattle). But for some reason he just went off! I was telling him that, as my grandmother is currently updating her will, I slightly suggested that I be the receiver of her artworks. Now, I didn't demand thisDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-22093834077392873332007-02-15T12:15:00.000+10:002008-12-11T12:01:15.475+10:00Is it just me or is anyone else noticing the rather terrifying transformation of Tracy Grimshaw into Naomi Robson? Same painted-on, mismatched mask; same crusty, badly bleached hair that looks like the only wig Medicare will rebate for chemotherapy patients without forcing them to the "out of pocket" expense; same mutton-dressed-as-lamb "style". Blech. And this transformation is also reflected inDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-68891883977047402352007-02-14T14:11:00.000+10:002007-02-14T14:12:53.007+10:00Happy Tacky Red Pink and White Day everyone! I hope you all got many ugly teddy bears holding satin hearts or lumpy, badly assembled home-made heart-shaped butter cookies!I personally got a can of Diet Coke and a handjob. Both of which I had to get myself. Oh well!Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-20890615572048855542007-02-08T06:55:00.000+10:002007-02-08T07:17:58.131+10:00So, about nine months after the last Shave for a Cure thing we are forced to live through another one? UGH. How about letting it rest a full year, guys? I'm sure the people who actually WOULD shave their heads are still growing out last years. If that were the case, then re-shaving them wouldn't be particularly "brave" (which is the nauseating theme this year, as if one who chooses not to look Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1170764116183113352007-02-06T21:59:00.000+10:002007-02-06T22:15:16.196+10:00Two Disturbing Individuals for Whom Dawei Has Recently Entertained Sexual Feelings:1. Benji from So You Think You Can Dance?2. The waiter from my Chinese restaurant.AIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!These two options are quite terrifying as both break my traditional "type" of lust-worthy men. I really don't go for skinny, twinky boys with weird hair and birthdates that are years after my own. But for Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1170324838274804432007-02-01T19:59:00.000+10:002007-02-01T20:13:58.300+10:00Ugh, I just read in Vogue Living (which, incidentally, has sadly become one of my favourite magazines and I would LOVE to work there. Ugh, I'm queer) that Monika Tichacek won the Anne Landa Award and 25 grand for her shitty "video installation" called The Shadowers. I can pass judgement on this as I was forced to watch this piece of ass several times in 2005. Obviously I am in the wrong industry:Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1170225451646294002007-01-31T16:23:00.000+10:002007-01-31T16:37:31.663+10:00I was just suddenly hit with a blast of irrational pleasure and surprise. I have been spending this hot-ass day--the thermometer thingie on my Northern veranda told me it was 34 degrees in the shade at midday, although I'm not sure I trust it completely as at times it seems mildly retarded--lounging around in the airconditioning watching an array of shite TV. We have finally got Foxtel Digital (Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1169092432617046252007-01-18T13:48:00.000+10:002007-01-18T13:53:52.633+10:00You know who has a good job? That chick from Ready, Steady, Cook!. You know, she's the one you see for about half a second on each show; basically all she does is do a faux head count and then holds up the corresponding vegetable to the winning team in an attempt to illustrate the result for the slower viewers.How did she get that job? I could so do that. I am looking on Seek, but everything is Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1168989217790477302007-01-17T09:02:00.000+10:002007-01-17T09:13:37.806+10:00I'm not normally one to go for the whole New Year's resolution thing--I think they are just another self-enforced way people make themselves feel bad, and who needs staring another replica year in the face?--but secretly, deep down in the Dawei I don't reveal to many people, I actually make a resolution or two. Actually, I make loads. So always at this time of year I begin to feel bad about yet Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1167963690233252272007-01-05T12:18:00.000+10:002007-01-05T12:21:30.246+10:00Can all the working class rabble please go back to work now? If I walk past another cafe/shop/government department that is shut until the 10th (!!!) of January I will drop my trousers and take a dump on their stoop. Since when has it been a solid holiday from the 22nd of December until the 10th of January? Get back to work, slackers. Some of us need a coffee fix. Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1167884338671940952007-01-04T14:03:00.000+10:002007-01-04T14:33:51.500+10:00Last night I heavily flirted with the idea of transforming myself into one of those skeevy, hipster, faux-Beatnik types by removing the majority of my holiday facial hair but leaving a vague impression of moustache and pointy beard. I mean, not like a goatee, which are hideous. But like, I wanted to leave but a hint of moustache and the tiniest trail of beard in a very triangular and geometric Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1166965893913611472006-12-24T23:01:00.000+10:002006-12-24T23:11:33.930+10:00Hey team,Sorry for the absence of moi. I know it must have been painful. But rest assured my stint in Noosa was very pleasant and I thought of you often! I have a killer tan (avec ugly-ass tan line), and am like, totally broke from over-indulging in nice food and champagne. But that's okay. Cap Guy and I are doing okay at the moment as well. But my sister and her boyfriend may have just broken upDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1166070892381531312006-12-14T14:28:00.000+10:002006-12-14T14:34:52.403+10:00I never thought that this blog would turn into a page for voyeurs who could watch the implosion of my relationship like the death of some once-magnificent star (not that my relationship was ever really as glorious and radiant as a heavenly object), but I had to say that I have stooped to a new low. Cap Guy and I very nearly ended things the other day, but I swerved and managed to not do so Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1165722009925143492006-12-10T13:31:00.000+10:002006-12-10T13:40:09.943+10:00Sorry for not posting much lately, but I've been putting off my Christmas-shopping, menu-planning, and house-decorating by staying at Cap Guy's place for the past ten days or so. That's probably the longest period of time I've ever stayed with him in a row, and I think it has cleared up the question of if I could ever live with him or not. I think I'm going insane! I'm doing a cheeky, quick post Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1165280387908434132006-12-05T10:51:00.000+10:002006-12-05T10:59:47.923+10:00I know it's a bit poor form to do two consecutive posts about Dicko, but I had to (perhaps in self-flagellating style) admit that I had a sex dream about him last night! I am blaming my enormous intake of horrid Australian "sparkling". But it was so graphic and quite repulsive. My dream brain made Dicko much more unattractive (not that I think he is attractive!); he had grey hairs on his back andDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1164851738765410242006-11-30T11:39:00.000+10:002006-11-30T11:55:38.786+10:00So Dicko is meant to be returning to Australian Idol next year? Huh? Worst. Career. Path. EVER. Seriously, I'm all for Dicko and everything, but what exactly was the point of crossing over to channel 7 during his pinnacle? Oh yes, that's right: it's called "chasing the money and being a greedy asswipe". Silly me. I mean, I know it sounds a little hypocritical of me to eyeroll someone for lookingDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1164710159026315252006-11-28T20:08:00.000+10:002006-11-28T20:35:59.046+10:00Hey team.Sorry for letting down the blogging side for a while, but I've actually been enjoying some quite well-deserved holidays. Okay, so my life might not seem the most taxing, but I can assure you that this is the first time in like, ages, that I've been able to spend a whole week just lying around and doing nothing. Actually, this blog entry is a little intimidating! It feels a bit like how Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1163657602414714052006-11-16T16:10:00.000+10:002006-11-16T16:13:22.430+10:00I just spent $700 on accessories for a wedding I am attending on the weekend. I shall look outrageously hot.That is all.Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1163503282711190712006-11-14T21:07:00.000+10:002006-11-14T21:21:22.730+10:00I was quite sad when Belinda Emmett died. I don't know why; I never saw her on Home and Away, and I'm quite aware of how snitty some people can get about the preferential treatment of high-profile cancer/illness sufferers. But for some reason I was always so... I don't know, melancholy about poor Belinda. For like, the last ten years! I suppose it's just because she's young and blonde. And it's Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1162906383150332132006-11-07T23:11:00.000+10:002006-11-07T23:33:03.173+10:00Ah, Melbourne Cup. How I love thee. Well, I don't, of course. I don't live in Melbourne so I don't get a day off. But then again I don't have a job, so I suppose it's a moot point. And while I can appreciate "the nation" stopping to watch the ponies, I don't know why it has suddenly become such a huge-ass deal. Perhaps one has to actually attend the actual race for it to make sense, because to meDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1162476497763019332006-11-02T23:52:00.000+10:002006-11-03T00:08:17.806+10:00Despite having an awesome surname, Mr Prideaux, you are quite possibly the ugliest human alive. My goodness, Ian Roberts is a beefy footballer turned actor! Surely there are more attractive faggots throwing themselves at him than this walking lesion? Guys, I'm serious. His face is hypnotisingly ugly. Yeesh.I think it's a bit weird that this photo is linked in an article about the Roberts Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1162363720725898922006-11-01T16:28:00.000+10:002006-11-01T16:52:29.556+10:00The other day, Sam blogged about a "won't somebody think of the children"-esque article about men who cruise beats for gay sex. Despite the fact that I had lots of better things to do I decided to take the hard-hitting journalistic road and investigate the mechanics of Squirt.com. See my determination there? I had never heard of this website before, but it's actually quite amazing. Basically it'sDaweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1162215418160170412006-10-30T23:09:00.000+10:002006-10-30T23:37:15.273+10:00Today I completely indulged my inner faggot. Don't worry, I didn't pry my ass-cheeks open, thrust a funnel deep into my sweet pinkiness and pour a variety of ejaculatory emmisions into my hungry hole. I just went to Ikea, is all! Now I'm sure none of you down south are aware, but here in Queensland we have just been blessed with a brand-new, absolutely enormous Ikea. Of course, it's still filled Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1161674416674181172006-10-24T17:14:00.000+10:002006-10-24T18:14:04.230+10:00I've just worked out who Australian Idol's Dean Geyer reminds me of. It's been on the tip of my tongue all year (not that I've watched much of Idol this year, I'm afraid), and I feel such relief at realising who it was. Behold:Well, okay, obviously Dean has more hair. But his Keith Urban-esque flippy over-straightened hair is even more terrifying than Voldemort's shiny pate. But he has the same Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1161352487334086362006-10-20T23:54:00.000+10:002006-10-20T23:54:47.350+10:00I've decided to move to the Nederlands. What do you guys think?Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1160569862892104252006-10-11T21:35:00.000+10:002006-10-11T22:31:02.910+10:00So, to the absolute surprise of no one, Bindi Irwin has already fulfilled the first stage of her new contract with Irwin Corp. I of course, find this quite appalling. And I don't just mean because of her hideous hair crimping. I mean, girl, if you are going to go for the crimped look at least do the fringe too and then rock an outrageous side-pony or something. Actually, I find the hair crimping Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1160521830468634072006-10-11T09:03:00.000+10:002006-10-11T09:10:30.490+10:00Tinny music blaring from cheap, outdated mobile phone:*I'm telling you loosen up my buttons baby (Uh huh) But you keep fronting (Uh) Saying what you going do to me (Uh huh) But I ain't seen nothing (Uh) I'm telling you loosen up my buttons baby (Uh huh) But you keep fronti…*Thorpie: Hello, this is * puff* Thorpie’s Help Line, this is * puff* Thorpie speaking.Dawei: Uh, Thorpie, it’s Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3666867.post-1159869188366825142006-10-03T19:44:00.000+10:002006-10-03T19:53:08.390+10:00Seeing as I've gone wireless, I can take my blogging to whole new exciting places. Like, right now, I am so blogging in front of the TV. I am so at the cutting edge! But anyway, this is just a quick post. I thought I would fire one off as I just saw the new Australia Zoo ad, and it was... sad. Well, basically it's exactly the same ad (you know, with Bindi looking weird and hugging associated Daweihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04736234364181385586noreply@blogger.com